Accidentally joined a queen group chat, spoiled their fates, now they're forcing princesses on me

Pulled into the "Phoenix Dynasty" chat while pulling an all-nighter on my history thesis. Lü Zhi, Wu Zetian, and Empress Zhen started DMing me for help, while Dugu Qieluo kept offering to marry off her princesses. I thought it was a cosplay server—turns out they're the real deal. Too late to leave now? Jiang Qiannian, a broke history grad student, gets dragged into a chat group full of ancient Chinese empresses. He fires off a few casual historical spoilers, figuring he's just trolling some over-the-top roleplayers. Then Empress Zhen sends him a tearful voice message. Dugu Qieluo asks him at midnight if he wants a princess as his wife. Wu Zetian bows on video and begs him for guidance. The usernames—"The Phoenix Empress," "Sole Ruler of the World," "Master of the Six Palaces"—turn out to be 100% real. This isn't LARPing. They're actually rewriting history. And he, a sleep-deprived grad student, just got conscripted as their personal "historical advisor." Spoiling their futures was fun. Fixing their fates? Not so much.